Let those in power know that the true power is with the people!

Sign the petition against SOPA and PIPA and help keep freedom on the net! You can sign without worrying about your identity at Google -- you can even sign anonymously. This should be an important subject to all Americans because freedom is the cornerstone of our beliefs. What then can we say of our freedom if access to information is stymied by poorly written legislation that forces search engines, blogs,and social networks to censor content. We can't let our cyberspace become controlled by politicians who would decide what sites and content is acceptable based on unacceptable, corrupt reasoning. All it would take would be one tiny offense and an entire website could be taken down as a result. Can you say, "Goodbye YouTube" -- that would be a real possibility if these bills pass into law!

Join me in upholding our rights by opposing these bills on Google, Mozilla, and/or Wikipedia, to name a few.
https://www.google.com/landing/takeaction/

More information on the bills is available at the link provided and all over the web during today's internet strike. Thousands of websites are going dark or altering their appearance to raise awareness on this issue. You can help spread the word by telling your friends, your family, and your dog! Spread the word on your favorite social websites before it is too late to make a difference. Don't let them take away our freedom!

This will be my review of the conduct and activity of this week's Anime Night gathering. Some context: for some time now a group of my friends and I have been getting together once a week to watch anime as a group and just generally enjoy ourselves. The gathering has changed over time and my feelings about it are mixed. Part of the problem is that I am quite serious about anime -- I mean hyper-focus serious to the point of being oblivious to people calling my name -- and many of the people who have been attending recently are not as into it as I am. Now I don't fault people for having their own level of interest because everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion but what I don't like is when people start disrupting the experience with comments and side conversations. Maybe I am too strict but when I'm watching an anime I want to get the full experience, especially when it's a serious show and not a comedy. And that is my position on the subject.

Our meeting was quite lively this time. We even had a newcomer who seemed to be quite the catch for one of our less active members. It is fairly normal for us to get off track every once in a while but this time we actually managed to get all the way through the watchlist without being sidetracked all that much. Even one of our more hyper members was calm and attentive, which was quite satisfying to me. After the list was completed for the night I proceeded to show a short, two episode arc from Gintama, which perhaps wasn't to everyone's taste, but was well accepted by the end. Some of the group had gone to a separate room to talk and they returned at the end of these episodes, bringing with them the topic of strange stuff on the internet (isn't most of the internet strange stuff anyway) and sending us down a path of insanity. It would seem that some of the group feels that it is our lot in life to corrupt the minds of some of our more innocent group members ... I don't particularly agree with the practice but I also do not think that it was harmful in this situation so I did not stop them. After a while I threw on some mindless YouTube videos, the humor of which was apparently known only to myself, and we then went on to watch some of the anime School Days -- a title which really belies a subject of extreme emotional strain centering around young relationships. I think I have actually hooked many of the members on this series. Whether or not that makes me a sadist will be determined as we continue with the anime.

Looking forward I want to change a few things about our Anime Night gathering. First of all, it is taking a long time to complete a single series, let alone those that have multiple seasons. As a result of this I think people are gradually losing interest and getting distracted. This is why I want to reduce the number of shows to three and double up the episodes of each that we watch during each gathering. Second is a bit more secretive and involves creating another group of more serious anime fans. I am not trying to say that the people in the current meeting do not enjoy anime, I and several others are just tired of the constant distractions that come with the current group. We are not replacing the existing group but supplementing it with a private and less spazzy second group.

That's all for now. Now if only I can get over this cold in the next few days ... my mind is clouded by the symptoms of the infection and I am unable to enjoy my usual array of anime.

'Till next time,
PEACE~!

I'm a little surprised that Xanga is still around ... I remember there was a scare several years back that they would just disappear along with a lot of the other websites that were competing with Facebook and other such lameness. But, I am quite glad that this blog site is still alive and ticking since I need an excuse to start writing more. So, if there is anyone out there who still feels like reading my blog -- I'm back!

Now I'm just going to ramble on about random stuff that's been going on in my life. If you're not interested in reading all my musings and grumbling just skip to the bottom. This is going to be a stream of consciousness, more or less, so excuse any disorganized thoughts.

Things have been rather strange lately in terms of my mood. It's up and then it's down and I just can't seem to stabilize it. Things that I have always enjoyed doing and should still enjoy, since there have been no epiphanies in relation to my usual activities, are now dull and colorless. I guess it's safe to say that I am in the midst of a depression. However, I've never experienced a depression as wishy-washy as this. It seems to be complicated by the way that I always worry about my physical health like the hypochondriac that I am to the point that it becomes a case of "I think I am sick therefore I am." At the same time I like the motivation, drive, confidence, and whatever else is necessary to actually discuss my problems with anyone that could help. It's a feeling of helplessness and self-pitty (or something like that) that consumes any desire to rectify the situation, leaving me in a further depressed state. This is not just limited to heath, either. I tend to apply this crazy logic to everything these days. The lame thing about it is that I know exactly what I am doing and how it is effecting me, but somehow knowledge doesn't feed into application and I just end up even more confused. I spoke to a counselor about these things at school for a while ... and then I stopped going because I felt that I wasn't putting forth the effort to make the changes that we discussed. Oh, I guess I should mention, while I'm on the subject, that school has been horrendous as of late. My grades have slipped to the same dismal level that they were at during high school. Why is that, I ask myself. Because of some ridiculous circular logic that ties into the courses. It goes a little something like this: I'm taking Class A and Class B, both are fairly difficult, because I need to study Class B's work I will reduce my attention on Class A, but then I realize that I need to pay attention to Class A as well and slack off in Class B, this leaves both classes in the toilet and my mind tightened up like with all the tension of a braid of hemp. I know all too well that I do these things to myself but how do I take action when I am my worst enemy? This is something that I will be reflecting on for a while since I am taking a semester off from school. Hopefully everything will fall in order before I end up in a padded room.

Changing subjects, I have been using some of my talents to help people lately. I have set up five different people's entertainment centers over the last two months. On account of this the thought of starting a business of setting up electronics for people in their homes has crossed my mind recently. I really don't have any idea where to start with such a thing, though. So much easier is it to do these things informally. I suppose I could apply at an existing company and then branch off on my own after I learn the trade. Speaking of job applications, I wonder how many people know just how fncking difficult it is to find a job right now. Or is it just me? Am I just not making myself attractive to employers? It really makes one feel unwanted when one puts in a hundred applications for work and gets no calls. There seems to be no hope but I'm going to continue with the attitude that it's not hopeless until I stop trying.

There have been some other things eating at my sanity. This is the silliest thing but I am getting seriously pissed off at Forza. I consider myself to be fairly adept at the art of drifting in car games -- by no means an expert but at least one of the best among my friends. I should explain drifting for those that don't know ... drifting is basically driving sideways through turns. There are many forms of drifting and a healthy amount of fans, one of which is writing this blog post. I took the time, when drifting was becoming popular in Japan, to study the sport and learn the tricks of the trade. I felt quite confident that I had learned how to drift and my performance in game reflected that. Now, take that pride I feel in being good at this activity and crumple it up into a little ball, chew on it a little bit, get it good and soggy, and discard it on the side of the road somewhere -- that's how I feel right now. This is because a friend of mine who is new to drifting has been destroying my scores in game and seems to be doing it with minimal effort. Not only that but he does it in a way that to me doesn't look appealing at all, because drifting is largely about style, but apparently the scoring system in Forza begs to differ on the subject. I consider it to be my style, my code of conduct that the score of a drift takes a backseat to the physics of it. In other words, I would much rather my drift be fast and clean and visually appealing than be concerned with the points; and yet, I can't stop thinking about how my scores are never quite good enough to usurp my friend's in this case. It may be that I am just nuts to feel so distraught over a game but this has been the subject of bloody-eyed obsession for many a late nights recently. It's so frustrating to be schooled by a newcomer and to really have no valid reason why I can't reclaim my top place on the scoreboard other than my stubborn set of rules that I make for myself. So, I guess my code of honor is going to restrict me to second place in this situation unless I can find some way to up my game.

That's all I'm going to write about my problems for right now. I suppose I'll also be posting my fiction as I begin to ease my way back into writing. In order to do so I need to wrestle myself off the couch for a few hours and hope that my mind is in order. But we will see how it goes.

Until next time,
PEACE~!